Going on a Patreon Adventure: My Avian War Origin Story (I was chased by a flock of seagulls)
Greetings friends and welcome to Patreon Adventures where the topic is decided by my Patrons over on Patreon. Once a month I add an extra post to my schedule, and it could be about anything.
If you’ve been around for awhile, chances are you’ve seen one of my storytime posts. Most of which involving birds and their conspiracy against me. This month my patrons demanded another tale of woe of this Kaleena and her avian foe.
Kal versus A Flock of Seagulls
This might have happened back in 2004, but I remember this day vividly as if it happened yesterday instead of fifteen years ago (holy crap I am old).
My friend and roommate at the time, Jess, and I used to have what we called Random and Spontaneous Days where we would decide to hang out and just see where the day would take us. On one fall afternoon we decided to head down to Belmont Park to ride the roller coaster and play in the arcade like the responsible 20 year olds that we were.
As a note: if you are ever in San Diego and want to have some fun, Belmont Park is where it’s at. It’s a beachfront amusement park where parking and admission are free, and it’s a ton of fun!
Okay, back to the story!
So Jess and I went to Belmont Park to ride the roller coaster and eat fair food. Mmm, delicious fair food. It was a fun adventure, after which we randomly and spontaneously decided to go to eat burritos (are we surprised?) on the beach itself. I always carried a beach blanket in the trunk of my car like a good SoCal gal, and we sat down to watch the waves, chat, and eat.
I remember we looked behind us and there were a couple of seagulls watching us eat. We laughed and continued to eat. And the bird cawing got louder. And we looked up and a bunch of seagulls had surrounded us in a circle.
We. Were. Surrounded. By. A. Circle. Of. Seagulls.
They were creeping me out.
I finished eating my burrito and went to the water.
Jess left her burrito nub on the blanket and joined me.
The coven of seagulls wasted no time leaping upon the burrito nub and I assumed that they would leave us alone since the food was gone.
They did not leave us alone.
So we decided to leave, laughing all the way back to the car about how random and spontaneous our Random and Spontaneous Day had turned out. And then noticed the flock of seagulls were waddling behind us. Excuse me. The food is gone.
We got into my car safely and thought it was over. I remember pulling out of the parking lot to go back around Mission Bay and a flock of mopeheads surrounded the car. I literally had never seen a flock of mopeheads before and haven’t since.
We may have played So I Ran as we escaped the coast, feeling rather lucky that we didn’t get shat on. In my head I remember the song coming on but I don’t know if the radio played it or if it was us. Nonetheless, LOLOL
I genuinely think this experience is what began my fear of birds and their deciding to mess with me. To hunt me.
Thank you so much to my Patrons for supporting me and my content! I hope you enjoy this month’s post and I can’t wait to see what you all choose for September.
If you would like to support my work for as little as $2 per month, check out my Patreon!
Am I the only person who seems to have been named Avian Enemy #1? Let’s chat in the comments!
Let’s go on another adventure together!